Friday, November 27

Should I be angry or amused? I'll take amused.

At first when people started noticing my belly and taking the liberty of asking me all sorts of personal questions and scrutinizing my figure in usually inappropriate ways I was a little self-conscious. My child’s gender has been predicted based on the size and shape of my abdomen more times than I can remember (according to most people it’s a boy because I’ve expanded up more than out; one woman told me that if it were a girl my butt would be bigger.) But now I’ve come to appreciate these little comments as other people’s excitement and desire to share in the joy of new life and so I just roll with it.

Yesterday was a little different.

I was washing my hands in the bathroom at WalMart. There was another lady in there -- about 50ish, small, and witch-like -- who seemed to be adjusting the back of her dress, so she was looking into the sink as she reached behind her head. Lifting only her eyes, she said to me, “Is this your first baby?”

Me, smiling, anticipating her excitement for me: “Yes.”

Then, in a tone of neither curiosity nor cluelessness about the socially acceptable but rather a flat tone of accusation and still without lifting her head she said, “How old are you.”

I was so taken aback that I wasn’t quick enough to say, “How old are you? And how much do you weigh?” Or even, “Excuse me?” Instead I just said, “Twenty-four.”

Her tone didn’t change, and she replied, “You look very young.”

I laughed and said, “Yeah. But I’m married.” And then left the bathroom.

Maybe you had to be there, but I was blown away by the gall of the whole thing. I know I look like a pregnant teenager, but to indict me for it…come on!


Nancy said...
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Nancy said...

THE GALL!!! I swear, some people.

When Derek was a few days old I had already had a couple of dumb things said to me (believe it or not) and I was complaining to my dad about it. He said -- in my dad kind of way -- "Having a baby somehow gives people permission to say THE DUMBEST things." And let me tell you, he's been more than right! Haha.

And while I didn't comment on your last post, I say nice work on figuring out what will be the best thing for you. Just like when you figured out all the other things you've ever done. It'll be great.

Best of luck! I can't wait to see that little baby!

Amy said...

Ha! That's awesome. Maybe someday I'll grow up and be that old lady offering all sorts of unsolicited opinions and advice to young mothers.

Kim said...

The nerve of some people!!!

I had some late twentiesish lady eye me up and down at the mall one time as she walked by and said "good luck with that one." Granted, I was with a bunch of teenage boys from home who were on the road "touring" with their band.